Monday, March 29, 2010

There's a hole in my umbrella...

So, I've been waiting for the Lord to show me what my next entry would be about and as I was driving to Target with my mom beside me and my little boy in the back seat...He spoke! When I told my sweet hubby the title of this blog- he immediately said, "well, that sounds positive"...but, like he has for the last 9 years...just bear with me! God can do amazing things with holes in umbrellas....

I was talking to my mom about the last 3 years of my life. She was asking questions, in a loving, motherly sort of way, to try to figure out how I "really" was doing and dealing with all that has happened in the past weeks. This was the first time she's seen me in person, so she was watching all my facial expressions (all of you who are close to your mom know EXACTLY what I'm talking about; and I consider having a mom that loves me enough to watch me in that way one of the greatest blessings in my life!) As I was driving, along with the sun beaming through the sunroof, something suddenly became so clear to me about the last 3 years and where I am now, God painted a very specific picture on my heart and I will attempt to share just that in the paragraphs that follow...

The short version of the blessings and awesomeness of the last 3 years is asleep in the room down the hall. His name is William Calan. He has blond hair highlighted by the sunshine. and beautiful eyes that are the color of chocolate pudding! His laugh is music to my soul and his hugs and kisses are warm and cozy (and maybe a little tight) like your favorite sweat shirt from college. Really, he is amazing! After he was born, our lives changed. Our hearts changed. Our marriage changed. Our home changed. Everything changed. We had a full year filled with hurt and heartache and all that comes along with it before we found out he was on the way. And when William came into our lives it was as though it began to rain blessings, straight from God's heart to ours. It was a slow and steady rain, the kind that lulls you to sleep on a Sunday afternoon, it was a healing rain, and a rain that brought unspeakable joy that can only come from God. I was able to work part time, Jason loved his job, we got to spend lots of time with our families...and the rain kept coming down(remember, this is good rain, showers of healing and joyful blessing)!

The picture that I saw in the car Saturday, while talking with my mom, was me standing in the middle of a path with rain pouring on my head, it soaked my hair, my face, my, I got out an umbrella and put on some rain boots. I'd lost my appreciation of the refreshment we can receive in blessings from God. You know, I'd kind of just gotten used to all the showers He was sending me...a healthy and smart little boy, time at home with him, close relationships with friends, a marriage relationship that was growing, a beautiful home, trips to the park, not wanting for anything, another baby on the way...and so on. The blessings kept falling, but I just began not to even notice all the "water" I was standing was still just pouring off the sides of my umbrella. I'd gotten comfortable wading around in the puddles, and wasn't really taking the time to stop, recognize and thank the One who authored this joy-filled season of my life. Then, all of a sudden, on March 1st...I got a hole in my umbrella!

The water started to, "drip....drip...drip..." right on the tip of my nose. Did my heart ache? Yes! But did I come to the realization that I was standing knee deep in blessings that had fallen straight from the hand of God? Definitely! I have come to the appreciate the fact that I may have gone through many more days and seasons standing in water without even noticing how many blessings were in my life, but, I serve a God who loves me so much...he poked a hole in my umbrella! So, I'm going to "consider it JOY!" (James 1:2) and start playin' in the puddles!

Isn't he the cutest, most beautiful "rain drop" straight from heaven????

1 comment:

  1. You inspire and encourage me. I am blessed to know you and even more now through your posts... thank you so much for sharing.